16th Aug, 2014

The black sheep

black sheep

All my life I have swum against the tide
Not doing what other people expect
Following my own path
It has been difficult for me
It still is
I don't know why I'm like that
My life would be so much easier if I followed the crowd
But then would I be happy?

27th May, 2013

What's wrong with the apples in the UK?


I used to love apples. Just biting into one was a joy. The sudden pop as my teeth pierced the skin. The shock wave that travelled through my entire body as the intense flavour of the apple juice assaulted my unsuspecting tastebuds. The crisp crunchy texture of the flesh temporarily deafened me as I chewed, and this same texture helped to clean my teeth.

These days are gone in the UK. Instead I get a dull squish as my teeth pierce the skin. The apples are bruised and battered. The flesh of the apple has a flowery texture, like it's old and has seen far better days. I suspect most apples from supermarkets here have been in cold-storage for at least a year before they hit the supermarket shelves. And they have the audacity to charge normal prices and place such apples in the fresh fruit section!

After consumption of an apple with skin, a few minutes later I get the sudden urge to vomit and feel distinctly unwell for a good 15 minutes. If they are going to spray huge amounts of pesticide onto apples, couldn't they at least have the decency to wash it off? Why should the consumer have to do it? Why doesn't anybody complain about this?

As a consequence, I have to peel all apples that I consume, and therefore I loose a significant proportion of the nutritional value of the apple. I'm not sure if it's true, but I've been told that much of the goodness of an apple just lies under the skin. Can anybody confirm this?

If you pay double the normal price, you can get some so-called finest apples. These are a bit better than the normal apples, but they are still often bruised, flowery and generally inferior to the apples I used to remember eating in New Zealand.

10th Feb, 2009

The mysterious case of the eaten snowman


With all the snow recently I was able to build a fantastic snowman in the back garden. It had a carrot nose, potato eyes, a flowerpot hat complete with gloves and scarf.

When I woke up the next morning, I noticed with dismay that it's nose had been bitten off! This was quite a shock to me because the snowman is tall. It got me wondering what kind of dangerous creatures are wandering around in my garden at night? The next morning, I checked again. This time the nose was completly missing and the potato eyes had vanished too!

I will be sure to lock my door at night from now on...